"You always do what you want..."

Chasing your dream isn't easy. It's not supposed to be.

This is a tough time of year for me, like most stuff, I'm pretty open about that. It didn't get any easier when I was driving down the highway yesterday and an 18 wheeler blew a tire in front of me. I got very lucky. Some people were looking out for me, and I made it out with just a few hundred dollars of minor damage to my car. But through the tough times, all the while, I keep my eyes fixed on where I want to be.

Honestly, I couldn't do that though without all the great support I get from so many outlets. I want to focus on the support other people give me. I have great mentors, friends, and brothers looking out for me, and I'm very blessed.

Last Friday, I talked to my AMC, one of my favorite fraternal brothers. Benny is someone I look up to, and he helped me become the man I am today, like any good AMC is supposed to do. It was his birthday and I was on the phone with him. We were catching up, and I was telling him about some of the ups and downs I've had the past year. Then he said something that made the difference for me, and really has picked me up.

He cut me off and said, "That's what I admire about you, you always do what you want to do."

I'd like to agree that this is a true statement, for the most part. Always is such a definitive word, but I'd agree that I try my hardest to do what I want to do. I figure, if your time on Earth is limited, why not spend as much of it as you can doing the things that are important to you. I guess I developed this habit, or maybe it's better framed as a philosophy, as a teenager. I placed value on doing certain things, like working out and hitting the basketball court, working on my game, every single day. Then around that, I was able to manage my time accordingly.

It's important to find what you enjoy doing, find what you need to do, and find what you're obliged to do, and do it. I waste time. I'm guilty of it, we all are. I don't get even get close to doing everything I'd like too. Now I have to ask myself though, "Well, what's holding you back?"

4 years ago, when I lost a brother, I got a brutal reminder that one day all of us run out of time. I posted on here about a month ago telling you to stop wanting and start doing. What a great compliment to have someone tell you that you are successful in this, especially someone you love and respect.

So, as you plan how you spend your day, waste less time, and always strive to do what you want to do. Chase your dreams, work to not only be happy, but to be at least confident that you got the most you could out of today.  Live in your own reality and trust that good days are ahead if you make them.

Twitter: @travisponton

Someone has passed on you...

I'm dealing with a struggle from within right now. You've been there before, when you're ready to just rip into someone so bad, but instead choose to just take the high road and "let it go". Is it more rewarding to not hold any punches and just let loose on said idiot, or does your "reputation" run the risk if you do react. How much should you really care about what that person thinks or says? Or, then again, how much would someone else care? It's tricky.

Somewhere along the line, someone has passed on you. They've compared you (see previous post) and chose someone else for that position, opportunity, etc. If you live in your own reality, you realize it's probably not your fault. Maybe the other guy was better suited, or, most likely, that decision maker just made the wrong choice. Maybe someone knew someone, some kind of politics came into play, you know, stuff happens. But, either way, in some context, you've been passed up.

Me, I've been passed on more times than I can count. So, I am reverting back to my high school days on this one, and making a list. This list is composed of those who have passed on me before, people I have to prove wrong every single day. I grew up playing ball under a lot of sayings, one of them is that even when your coaches aren't there, play like they are still watching, because they always are. You're always in the spotlight, and a lot of that light comes from those who didn't see enough in you to give you a chance.

One of the most bull shit societal sayings is, "Don't take it personal." I say, absolutely take it personal. Make your list right now, of people that have done you wrong and made you angry. Let that list motivate you every day to do more, work harder, and rise up. My list is full of names of all the haters out there who don't think Travis Ponton belongs, don't think Travis Ponton can hack, don't think Travis Ponton deserves something. It's funny, I look back on some of the names that used to be on that list, and I've done a lot more than they have.

Transitioning now, a lot of you who know me, know at least part of the story of what happened in the early morning hours of September 14, 2008. It was early that Sunday morning that many of us lost a brother, lost a friend, when Bobby Thomason was murdered in Radford. It's a night that I don't go a day without thinking of, remembering being right there, second guessing myself, wondering why it was him and not me. I can still close my eyes and picture what happened.

I shouldn't be here.

And yet, here I am.

That thought crosses my mind often. God picks us to deal with tough circumstances, and he picks his time for all of us to succeed and fail, to be born and to die. I can confide in that.

I have to say, I never thought I'd be riding in the car with one of my fraternal brother's parents, telling them how their son died, showing them where his body landed. Being in that Emergency Room, washing his blood off my hands. I still remember the funeral, September 23, taking off my paul bearer lapel and laying it on the coffin, as hundreds of people said goodbye, and the military fired those rounds in the air to the sound of the bugle playing TAPS. Brotherhood runs deep for me, because like most everything in life, it's fleeting.

This will be a tough weekend for me, no doubt. Always is. It'll hurt a little more than usual the next 10 days or so. Like many, I never forget. I am a better person because of Bobby Thomason, and I can do much, much more to be great for his sake, because I'm here. I have the opportunity to do what others can't. I'm sorry that I haven't done more with that opportunity, and I'll always be sorry I didn't do more on September 14, 2008.

It's what we go through, what we overcome in life that makes us who we are. No one can judge you. Someone somewhere has passed on you, but they don't know anything about what makes you special, what makes you tick. They couldn't walk a mile in your shoes. I find that I can't put into words how I feel, but if you want to know why I love the game of basketball, why I'm so passionate about coaching, and why I love to win, there's a little insight.

Live in your own reality. Be great because others never got the chance to. Never Quit (BT).

Always your brother...